Aspirations and expectations

Q. Which of these ladies is most attractive?

We all have our 'ideal' body that we are aspiring to be. For many people it is a version of their former self, perhaps pre-baby or as teenager. For some it may be a strong athletic Amazonian warrior woman. Others aspire to be like supermodels. Fantastic. It is great to have a goal, an end point on which to focus your efforts. The thing is, I think you have to be realistic. Otherwise you will never be happy. There is no point wishing you had legs up to your armpits or a 60cm waist if you are simply not built that way.

I had unrealistic expectations. I was wishing to be like the lady on the far left. In my head I was daydreaming about a concave midriff and long, slender thighs. Wearing certain clothes where a bra is not required. Errr yeah right....It is unlikely that I will ever be able to go bra-less. Not unless I decide to move to a nudist colony and develop the best pair of spaniels ears I could ever desire. It just isn't going to happen. I have spoken about my walrus on a previous blog. I don't think that will EVER totally disappear so bye bye concave midriff. I am 5 foot 4 (162 cm) so even if my legs were up to my armpits they would still only be as long as a normal person's legs..... Lets be realistic here. I actually think the lady on the right is more attractive ans I'm thinking I should be aiming more for a figure like hers, or the lady in the middle. It's difficult because we are all different shapes and sizes, we shouldn't compare ourselves to others.

Trouble is, I don't have a version of my former self to aspire to either, as this is it. This is pretty much as slim as I have ever been since I was a young teenager (except for my flabby midriff). My clothing size is 14-16 (UK) and I distinctly lack a waist. I deperately want a waist. My chest (as in ribcage not boobs) and my waist measurement are pretty much the same and then my hips go out a bit. My fat is pretty much concentrated between my ribs and half way up my thighs. And yes I know this is the most dangerous shape to be.

I know I will never look like one of the teenagers in my ballet class. I am not built like Ms Left up there. I know I will never be tall with long thin legs. SO there is no point wishing for it anymore.

I can't ever quite believe I will fit into anything less than a size 12 and I can't quite imagine how I will lose the required cm from my waist. I am dying to find out what I will look like when I weigh what I am healthily supposed to and there is only one way that I will find that out. I am going to try bl**dy hard. I am going to WW for all I'm worth, I am going to exercise as much as I can.

That way I will become the best version of me that I can be.