I have been deeply affected by the Biggest Loser (Australia).... I have never watched it before but I am addicted to this series and there is something one of the trainers said a while ago that I have been mulling over in my mind.
I have already blogged
about needing to feel some discomfort...that to get results it has to get
tough....yada yada yada I accept that...no I well and truly grab that one by the
big, fat horns....
What has affected me this week is the need to let go of needing
other people's affirmations and approval. You have to stop caring what other
people think. The red poppy-eye woman trainer...Michelle? was saying that to one
of the over 30's women.
To quote somebody
obviously more gifted with words than me...as my title says: "Those who matter
don't mind and those who mind don't matter"
Sometimes I feel so self
conscious I may as well be a painfully shy teenager again. I have days where I
go over and over and over a throw away comment that someone has made, analysing
"what they really meant by that". I sit here and wonder why I only have 3
followers on my blog....FOLLOW ME why don't you?....(please?? and don't hate me
Whenever I have attempted to lose weight in the past, I
have had in my mind and as my goal, what other people will think of me when I have done it...
Age 13: "If I
lose five pounds then Sally and Catherine will want to be my friend" (beeotches)
16: "If I lose half a stone then Nicholas will ask me out" (ooohhh Nick, you
Age 19: "If I lose ten pounds then I will be able to wear a size
12 dress to the summer ball and snog loads of blokes" (turns out drunk students
aren't that fussy anyway...ew).
Age 22: "If I lose a stone I will actually
look like I belong on this course (Yes I have a Masters' degree in exercise and
health science but that is a whole nother blog's worth of embarrassment to be
covered in the future)
Age 26: "If I lose twenty pounds I will be a beautiful
bride and everyone will turn and gasp at my gorgeousness as I walk down the
aisle" (there were a few gasps...possibly because my boob fell out of my
strapless dress....actually it didn't but that would have been funny)
so it goes on....UNTIL NOW...I am coming round to the thinking that it actually doesn't
matter what other people think. I am my harshest critic and even I need to be kinder to myself. I am trying not to worry so much about the perceptions of others. I am not there yet but am certainly better than
I was. So right now this is what I am thinking:
Age 36: "If I lose
two stone I will feel fit, healthy and be able to do ballet properly because my
legs will not be too fat."
Any other compliments, affirmations,
approvals will be welcome but not necessary.